Undie Reviews DC is my underwear review blog that, until today, had been located on Tumblr. Unfortunately, the nature of reviewing underwear means that a number of my posts no longer met Tumblr’s updated community guidelines. As such, I’ve been searching around for the best place to move my blog. Landed here on WordPress for its immediacy and ease of importing things from Tumblr; TBD if I stay here permanently, but for now: hi! =-D
Will be migrating my Tumblr posts here shortly, once I get this officially marked as mature (to be safe).
Material: 95% Modal, 5% Elastane, really sleek feeling, and also done here to be a bit thicker than a lot of other pairs that have similar material. Not super-thick to the point of being builky, but definitely intended to have a sense of “solid” to it, as opposed to similar-fabric fashion pairs where the material is lightweight and show-off-y-thin. It certainly helps with a bit of extra warmth in this cooler season! Though it’s not hot in warmer wearing either. Aesthetic: Solid color, plain and utilitarian. You won’t turn any heads with this pair, but that’s not a bad thing – especially for a pair that’s all about comfort and functionality. Waistband: A nice middle-height waistband that’s covered with an extension of the fabric. Low-rise but can also be worn a bit higher if you want. Pouch: Like the previously-reviewed Saxx, Sheath Underwear is known for – and heavily markets – its unique inner pouch design, made with the intent of providing nuanced support and separation for the male anatomy. And even though it’s focused on a bunch of inside design elements, it also somewhat does shape the profile of your bulge, so there’s a little bit of showing-off involved. But it’s mostly meant to compartmentalize “willie and the boys” such that there’s no skin-on-skin contact (and in a way to eliminate chafing, which is probably why the fabric is nice and low-friction itself). While Sheath started with their “Zen” single-pouch design, which is a loose panel of fabric on the inside of the pouch meant to come up under the boys and make a little “cup” for them to hang inside, almost all of Sheath’s men’s boxer-briefs now have their “Dual Pouch” design, which takes the entire height of the pouch (inside the cup) and adds an extra top-to-bottom panel of fabric with a single circular hole (nicely hemmed) for your willie to stick through as well. This, per their website, is “for a gentle and unobtrusive separation between the penis and testicles”.
A nice benefit of this is that it’s allowed them to take the outside layer of the pouch and add a very-easy-access fly on the edge of the pouch, which (to me at least) is a massive bonus. It also lets the outside and middle panels to be loosely shaped – it’s the inside panel of the cup that’s up against the body – so it has a slight advantage over Saxx’s flat, single-panel design in that regard. Both brands are incredibly successful at well-providing a highly comfortable environment for your family jewels. While I would say that Sheath is even more effective in this regard, it does come at a small price of effort: the main cup of the inner pouch doesn’t naturally come up under your balls just from pulling the pair on, and even if it did, your willie isn’t likely to slot right into its intended hole either. So you’ll have to take an extra second or two when pulling them on in the morning or after going #2 (but not going #1, thankfully!) but I think that’s a small price to pay for how nicely these fit and feel. Backside: Not too much to speak of back here! Which is understandable; like with Saxx, all of the design effort went into the front. The fabric here isn’t as tight as the material Saxx used, so there’s a little less natural shaping here as it’s not holding your cheeks in place as much, but that’s fine by me. At the very least, there’s enough shape that it looks like it has some nice separation between the legs. And, for once, there isn’t a tag at all! I’m not sure how they got away with that… Legs: Not loose-loose, but definitely not what you’d call tight; the legs here are sized just enough to lie against your thighs without providing any real squeeze – so there’s not a ton of support here, but they won’t bunch up when pulling your pants up, or anthing like that. Side note: while most of Sheath’s underwear are “boxer-briefs” with 3.5 inch inseams, they also offer “trunks” with 1.5 inch legs and “sport performance boxers” with great 8 inch inseams (as well as full-leg-length pants). Other: The pair I have is marketed as grey, but to me it seems to have a definite greenish shade to it. Overall: 4.5/5 – I love this pair and you will too! The only minor drawback – and the only reason I’m not giving it a full 5/5 – is that the unique inner pouch design (and nice fabric) drives up the price a little bit. You can get a pair with the Zen single pouch for less than $25, but you won’t get below that price for the double pouch unless you splurge on a multipack. Great for: Everyday wear, Activewear, Sleepwear Good for: Loungewear, Sex wear(?)
Material: 95% Modal, 5% Spandex, super comfy! It’s incredibly breathable and lightweight, very low-friction without feeling synthetic at all, and comes somewhat close to being sheer… Aesthetic: The bikini cut is always fun, and the white stripe around the waistband adds a bit of dynamic flow to the look. I also really dig the “fancy” stylized Cocksox logo on the waistband… really fun take on their brand. Overall, it’s grey, but I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot fot the color; it’s always seemed really casual and lazy-time-at-home to me, in a very good, relaxing and still appealing way. Waistband: Nicely stretchy and very comfy! Low-rise since it’s a bikini cut. The one incredibly minor drawback of the pair is that the lower hem of the pair is, compared to the rest of the waistband, tighter and less stretchy. Only in comparison, though; even if you notice the difference between the lower hem and the rest of the waistband while taking it on or off, even that hem would be an improvement to the waistbands on other pairs I’ve reviewed. Pouch: Take the amazing shape of the Cocksox thong pouch and the softness and looseness of the AC Almost Naked pouch, and that’s what you have here. I can’t recommend it enough. I can’t even find much to say about it – it’s just that good. Backside: Somewhat plain to look at, but very comfy to wear. It strikes this amazing balance between holding your cheeks and still feeling very freeing. Tag is printed on the inside and definitely unnoticeable. Above picture shows it can be full-coverage; below picture shows it more like how bikinis are intended. Comfort is good either way!
Legs: The leg openings are well-made; great fit that, if it errs at all, errs on being just a bit stretchy/loose, so they stay on nicely while letting you move freely. Other: I’ve alternatively seen this pair simply titled as “Waistband Bikini Brief” as well, both on CheapUndies (where I ordered it) and elsewhere. Overall: 5/5 – get this pair (if you can; it’s no longer on Cocksox’s website or several others I checked). Unless you absolutely hate bikini cuts, you’ll enjoy this pair immensely. Great for: Loungewear, Sleepwear, Everyday wear, Sexy wear Good for: Activewear
Material: 85% Polyester, 15% Spandex, to give a very smooth, breathable, though definitely synthetic feel. And while it’s definitely synthetic, it’s not annoyingly so – there is a softer, “realer” side to this synthetic material. And I think I’m talking about the pouch here – as mentioned before, anytime the waistband and/or non-pouch material makes up a significant part of an undie, I’m not quite as confident what the listed material combination actually refers to. Aesthetic: White/pink/light blue/dark blue is a great, bright, fresh-looking color combination that makes me think of an ocean sunrise, which is probably the intent for a “Laguna”-named pair. Not to mention that horizontal stripes are almost always successful at making a fun, engaging appearance.
Waistband: Very typical, about what you’d expect for a waistband. Sits at the hips, though you can probably pull the sides up if you want and it wouldn’t be very different. Pouch: Relatively plainly shaped as far as AC pouches go! This despite the fact that it’s advertised as an Almost Naked pouch. Roomy enough, and the edges are put together to keep you inside even if you’re packing a fair amount. It probably is called Almost Naked because it has a nice shape to it but it otherwise looser to let you move around a bit, in which case it definitely qualifies as Almost Naked – but, because it’s a jockstrap, there’s a certain necessary amount of structural integrity to the edges of the pouch, since there’s no other structure around, so like the Night Animal Jock it’s not fully what I’d expect of Almost Naked (though, unlike the Night Animal Jock, the lower border of the pouch doesn’t feel tighter than wanted). Backside/Straps: Basically exactly the same as the Night Animal Jock, except that I’d say the tag here might be a tad bit more forgiving, so that’s good! Other: This pair also passes the junk-out-below-the-pouch squat test! Overall: 3.5/5 – I’m not sure exactly what prompted the change in their production between the Night Animal Jock and this Laguna Jockstrap, but the slightly better tag and solidly better material mean that this pair gets a full point more. Definitely a better example of how well AC does jockstraps! Great for: Activewear, Sexy wear, Sex wear Good for: Everyday wear
As I’m sure everyone has already noticed, Tumblr has decided adult content will be disallowed from the platform starting two weeks from now, and their bots have been going around flagging everything adult – and, as many people are pointing out, much more than that. (Their bot wasn’t trained very well, and seems to be flagging posts from LGBTQ creators with alarming frequency, even if the posts themselves are entirely innocent.)
UndieReviews DC is not, persay, and entirely innocent blog, as the nature of reviewing underwear means you’re always very close to (and sometimes directly showing) male genitals and/or ass.
I try to keep this blog relatively professional, as all of my reviews – self-produced or reblogged – stay away from showing erect willies, even covered, and only 5-10% of my posts even expose the genitals to begin with. That said, mesh/sheer underwear and pairs that are designed to expose your junk with, of course, expose the genitals. It’s the nature of the subject matter.
About ¾ of my self-produced reviews in the past two or so months have been flagged; not of my older reviews have been flagged yet, but I assume that’s only because the bots are crawling backwards in time, because none of my recent reviews directly expose the family jewels, but some of my older reviews clearly do. I’ve asked for direct review of everything that’s been flagged before, as well as sent Support a message asking how viable this blog will be in the future simply due to its nature. If I get negative reactions to either, I think I may just have to jump ship. =-(
Material: 94% Acetate, 6% Spandex, described as “super stretchy ribbed fabric” that almost borders on mesh. I say it borders on being mesh both because of that ribbed texture and because you can almost see through the pair, especially when you stretch it. I’ve said before that mesh can be hit-or-miss if it lets your skin get “bumpy” through the mesh, in which case it gets uncomfortable having those skinbumps rub against anything else, e.g. your pants. Having a fabric that’s essentially super-tight-knit mesh here avoids that problem, and I love its texturing and breathability (also something that makes it mesh-like). It’s a lot thicker than basic net-style mesh, though, which adds a level of softness that I’ve never gotten on net-style mesh before. (I contrast net-style mesh with the “mesh” you get when you basically poke regularly-spaced holes in otherwise normal fabric, like some of the lightweight low-cut singlets I own.) Aesthetic: Slinky and dark blue! Solid color usually works well for thongs, and no exception here. Even if you can’t really see through the mesh when it’s in-wear, you can see that it’s a fun texture, so that’s kinda fun too. Waistband: Nothing more than a fold-over hemmed section of the same mesh material that makes the rest of the pair. It makes the “waistband” feel like it’s almost not there, and it’s a great mix between stretchy and tight. Pouch: I’ve mentioned once or twice before that @N2Nbodywear often has great pouches, and this thong has one of them! It comes out pretty well in the pictures above, and it’s really comfy from the inside too. It’s tight- and shaped-enough to provide excellent support, while the overall shape and material still allows for fairly free movement of the package as a whole, which is good if you’re moving around a lot (and for groping!) Backside/String: The one little drawback for this pair is that the texture and tightness of the fabric make it feel like it cuts in ever so slightly above your tailbone… You can see in the picture that it dives down between my cheeks somewhat quickly. That aside, though, it’s still a very nice backside! The tag is more solid than other tags I’ve encountered but not noticeable (maybe a side effect of the ribbed tightness over the tailbone?) Overall: 4/5 Great for: Sexy wear Good for: Activewear, Everyday wear(?), Sex wear(?)
My previous phone has been on its last legs for a while now, so over Thanksgiving I got a new one. It might take some time to create the newer posts, since the camera takes photos that are much squarer than my previous phone did. (It’s generally a good think – the narrow dimension is much wider now, and I think even the long dimension is a bit better.) I like the dimensions of the photos in my posts, though, so I’ll see what I can do with cropping. X-D
The pictures will be a lot clearer now, though! At least they should be – I usually shrink them for the blog anyway, so maybe that extra clarity might be lost either way.
Material: 95% Cotton, 5% Spandex, and oh so comfy =3 Very soft, nice gentle stretch. Sits in the middle ground between being very breathable and very warm – it’s either of them, but that’s because it doesn’t err to over-emphasizing either aspect.
Aesthetic: It’s not often that you see a fantasy world’s map on underwear! If you’re a nerd like me, or you just like seeing new things, this is a great pair. And the map overall looks great too color- and design-wise, so even if you’re not a nerd or into crazy designs, it still is a nice semi-different-but-not-too-out-there look; gold, brown, and black is almost always a nice mix.
Waistband: About what you would expect of a waistband, or at least what you would hope for, especially on a pair that seems built for comfort and relaxation. Not too short, not too tall, very soft, very stretchy. The red Zelda logo on the front is a great touch, too.
Pouch: Nothing super-impressive, but very comfy! Has enough space up top and lower down, plus does a moderately good job of keeping the boys away from your legs.
Backside: Pretty plain in terms of shaping features, but the nice map design makes it un-boring to look at. The soft, comfy material feels great over the entire back area. There’s a double tag in back, but it’s so soft you don’t notice it at all.
Legs: As with the rest of the pair, pretty comfy; nice stretch to them, and long enough for my liking.
Other: I honestly don’t know what to call the “brand” here – I ordered these from ThinkGeek, but it literally just has the Legend of Zelda logo on the back tag. X-D
Overall: 3.5/5 – nothing too incredible, but an overall solid, reliable, practical pair that will always be a good pick when you’re getting ready in the morning (or if you’re going to ComiCon!)
Undie Reviews DC 